Today, on my bus commute home, a couple with a newborn boarded the bus and the newborn was crying. You know, that little cry that only newborns can make? It's not too loud, not too soft, enough to make you look up, but not quite enough to make you cringe? I looked at the parents and had that "I know" feeling come across me. To be new parents is definitely an experience. You are so whipshawed into a state of utter confusion, anxiety, sleeplessness, fogginess. You're also so concerned with how you are parenting and if you're doing the right thing or if you should do it differently. The first week we brought Maddox home was a haze. I couldn't get the breastfeeding thing down and was tired beyond belief. I turned to the Internet and a stack of parenting books to answer my questions in the middle of the night. I cried a few times. I wandered around like I was on drugs. Not having any family around in the clutch times, anonymous mothers online were my therapists.
I also will admit, it wasn't love at first site. It was definitely like. But not love yet. I had this little being crying, spitting, chomping on my nipples...how could this be love?
I really wish I knew then, what I know now. And I guess this is why I'm writing this post. I almost can't wait for the second child. Now that I've been through it once, I can conquer anything.
I wanted to look over at that couple on the bus and tell them it will be ok. It will pass. It's really not as hard as it seems. I'm sure they will figure that out soon.